Mike’s trying to make me fat(ter)

Just got back from Starbucks, where I had another encounter with Mike, my soul mate Starbucks barista:

Me: “I’m SO GLAD it’s Friday!”

Mike: “You mean, you’re so glad you’re seeing me on Friday?”

Me: “I’m SO GLAD I’m seeing you on Friday.”

Mike: [high-fives me]

And then he gave me a subtle, unsolicited free cookie again (chewy chocolate this time), despite my attempt at subtle protestation.

No, I don’t ALWAYS wear this sweater

But I’m really trying to not eat more because it’s just the last thing I need, so when I got back to my office, I asked my boss if he wanted my cookie.

Me: “… and yesterday Mike gave me two giant warm chocolate chip cookies AND a breakfast sandwich–and I ate them ALL.”

Boss [as he listens, eating my cookie]:

Me: “OK, I’m going to repeat that, and I’m gonna need you to change your reaction.”