Alex vs. the Cunty Wells Fargo Manager

I’ll set the scene: At the bank, after I had talked to a couple tellers who couldn’t satisfactorily answer my question about why there was an 8-business day hold put on a check I deposited, when I know for a fact that the funds are available, the manager intervened (of her own accord–no one asked her to). Surprise surprise, she couldn’t answer my question either. Furthermore, she kept contradicting herself and the conflicting information the other bankers had given me.

At this point, we were both frustrated. I can’t say I was happy with the tone she was taking with me, but I’d say I was probably taking the equivalent tone with her–I would describe it was “aggravated”–but I didn’t think either of us had gotten to the point of inexcusably rude. But then, out of nowhere, she took the sass up several notches as she said to me:

“If you’re not going to talk to me like I’m a human being, I’m not going to help you.”

Me: “Wait what? How did we get there? Do you mean I’m talking to you like you’re an animal? I actually prefer animals to human beings, so if I was talking to you like you’re an animal, I’d be giving you nothing but love and sunshine right now. And what do you mean, are you just going to ignore me?”

Her: “I can tell you to leave.”

Me: “Really? Mmmmm also I’m pretty sure you can’t…”

And then she handed me off to a different banker, and as she walked away, she said to herself, “If you’re going to give me attitude I’m definitely not going to help you,” as if her decision to help me AKA do her job would be a favor and up to her discretion.

So I said, “I’m right here, I can hear you. I don’t get it–are we being filmed for an instructional video entitled, ‘Customer Service 101: What Not to Do’?”

And then she completely ignored me.

So I called the 1-800 customer service number to file a complaint, because she had repeatedly referred to herself as that branch’s “Manager,” so I assumed there was no one above her there to complain to. But, it turns out, per the customer service rep on the phone, she’s just the “Assistant Manager.” Can anyone say [a less enjoyable version of] Dwight Schrute?

10 thoughts on “Alex vs. the Cunty Wells Fargo Manager

  1. Mindy says:

    The fact that you so openly use any variation of the word “cunt” makes me so happy. That’s horrible because it’s a “bad word” but fuck that. I’m taking it back! Also, good for you for you for standing up for yourself when that woman was being rude and basically worthless.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. peckapalooza says:

    As a former banker I feel that I can say with a certain amount of confidence that her attitude had nothing to do with you. As a rule, about 72% of all bank employees hate their lives. She was projecting her hatred of her position onto you. The only way I avoided acting like that with people was by kicking a dent in the coin vault under my station on a fairly regular basis.

    Liked by 2 people

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